Struggle in our
hearts.
“So
I heard you have a boyfriend now?” buka saya, menerka dan
memastikan.
“Official
one? Like, seriously?” Cyrus memicing tak percaya.
Keith
mengangguk. “Correct. And correct. Any further question will be
sorted right into trash-bin. Shall we eat now?”
“Can’t.
Details required. This is the first time I meet u since last month.
Where have you been?”
“You
guys, please behave, he’s watching us.” Bisiknya. Tak lama
kemudian Ken mengantar sendiri satu set large variety sashimi.
Ada
semacam jarak dan sunyi ketika adegan barusan terjadi. Ken tersenyum
canggung, mengangguk sebentar sambil kemudian pamit kembali ke
pantry. “Itadakimasu.”
“Since
when bear guy being the most desirable latest spring accessories?”
sambar saya sambil tersenyum lebar.
“He
more looks like Mighty Joe Young rather than Paddington Bear. Or a
club bouncer.” Sindir Cyrus.
“Your
guy is every gay’s dream! Solid body, cute accent, tanned skin. I
approve! Be happy my Keith!” We almost hug.
Keith
mengunyah suapan pertamanya. “Oh Chris, belum aku cerita soal sex
ya. Oh gosh, the best in my life! For your ears only, guys, I do
bareback with him.”
“Whoaa awesome! So you can get herpes the next time you dial me. Did you
mistake his penis for his face again?” sindir Cyrus yang kedua.
Kami
terdiam semua. Keith berdiri tegas. “This is my gathering and my
treat-night. And if you’re going to ruin mine, you better get the
hell out.”
I
was stoned. This is going to be a war. I better chop another slice
and sit pretty.
“Do you know why I hate it? Kamu udah jarang
ngumpul, kuliah juga bolos terus, konsultasi skripsi juga gak
datang. I feel like fisting your boyfriend’s head for bring out
the worst of you! You say relationship? Well, u don’t need one!
Cause you! Are! Getting worse! Every time you’re attached with a
guy! And bareback sex? Really? Screw you for being such a priest
about safe sex to us all this time!”
“Out!
I don’t need your approval!” Mata Keith meradang.
Yes.
This is the first war. And I have a feeling this is gonna be long and
cold one.
Big Heart.
Ken
mengelap sisa busa pasta gigi di pipi Keith sambil kemudian
menciumnya. “Cheer up my bunny… You know I won’t let you go.”
“Look
at us, are you enjoying the view?” tatapnya di kaca.
“I
see a Perfection. Just like what I’ve been dreaming. Hugging a boy
that I love with all my heart, every single night.” Ken tersenyum
lebar. It’s easy to see that he’s saying the truth.
Pelukan
Ken makin erat. “We are the definition of perfect couple. We’re
just not in perfect situation.” Batin Keith, mematut kaca lama.
Capturing this kinda moment.
“I
want to stay like this… Forever.” Ken tak menyahut kali ini.
“Can
you promise that to me, Ken-Bear?”
Ken
menunduk, menyandarkan dagunya pada bahu Keith. “I’m tired… Can
we sleep now?”
--
Bagi
Keith, malam selalu berlalu lambat di kamar Ken. Keith terjaga dengan
menikmati setiap detiknya memandangi Ken yang mendengkur. Ada kala
kadang Ken mengigau marah dalam bahasa tanah airnya, Keith hanya
perlu menepuk pipinya perlahan dan semua seakan membaik.
Tepat
jam dua pagi dan ponselnya berbunyi pelan. “I’m such a bad bitch.
I apologize. I don’t want to be judge or God. I just want to be
your best-friend.”
“Call
me in a minute, bad bitch.” ketiknya membalas.
Keith
sudah dibalkon dengan sleeveless-tee Ken yang kedodoran di tubuhnya. “This
is good bitch talking. Kenapa bad-bitch?”
“Hm... I know that anger tone. I apologize, Keith. I just miss u, I guess…
Jadinya begini deh.”
“Missing
me?”
“Ingat
janji kita bakal wisuda barengan? Dan lainnya?”
Keith
duduk bersandar pada teralis balkon. “I’m afraid that’s not
gonna happen.”
“See…
Kuliah aja sekarang kamu jarang. Bimbingan skripsi juga skip melulu.
Ok sorry for the judge, can’t hold it. But why? Why?”
“Cuz
I have decided.”
“Decided
what?” pekik Cyrus diujung sana.
“To
spend the next six months with Ken. Before he leaves for good to
Japan.”
“He’s
only in Indonesia for six months? That’s the point! He’s
leaving!”
“You
really need combo jab on your both eyes, don’t you?”
“Oops
sorry again. I didn’t mean it. Ayolah Keith… Ga bisa disambi
skripsinya? Aku bantu deh ngetik semuanya, kamu tinggal kasih konsep.
Mumpung belum telat.”
“Wow!
I will forgive you if you’re willing to do that…”
“Damn
my big mouth. But yeah, I will. I really care about you. You and
Chris are the only true friends I have. If I have to eat horse shit
to save this friendship, I would.”
“Hmm…
Menarik…”
“No
way !! Not a chance in hell !” umpat Cyrus.
Pertanyaan
itu keluar juga. “Keith, kalo boleh nanya… Why him? Why Ken?”
“Everybody
loves big dick. But I love big heart.”
Keith
melanjutkan kalimatnya. “I just dropped one or two tears here, but
Cyrus I swear, he’s a good-sincere guy. He’s caring, he’s
making me happy and he fulfills my fantasy. He’s everything. ”
“If
you said so… Then you have my bless.” Suara Cyrus terdengar penuh
haru diujung sana.
“Thanks
for opening your heart for us.”
Cyrus
melembut. “That’s the least I can do. Be happy my pal. Be happy.”
“Besok
bimbingan skripsi jam berapa? I’ll be there.”
“Abis
lunch kita jemput yah.”
“Bye
for now. Thanks for all.”
Heart of the
matter.
“Good
morning, Bunny.” Kecup Ken lembut. Membangunkan Keith seketika.
“I
smell a mango-pancake.”
“I
made double, as usual.”
“You’re
so thoughtful.”
Ken
membopong tubuh Keith dan mendudukannya di meja makan. “Before you
eat, I have something for you to be remembered.”
Mereka
berhadapan. Ken memandu kedua tangan Keith, meletakkan tangan kiri
Keith pada pelipis kanan kepalanya, kemudian tangan kanan Keith di
dadanya. “Let this be our magic spell : Here I am, Bunny. I’m in
your head. I’m in your heart.”
Belum
pernah Keith tersenyum selebar itu sebelumnya. Wajahnya sumringah,
ganti mengulang gerakan Ken barusan pada dirinya. “Here I am
Ken-Bear. I’m in your head. I’m in your heart.”
“I
love you.”
“I
know. I love you more.” Bisik Ken.
-by
: C
